Tuesday, August 28, 2012
Secrets of a Successful Housewife and a Happy Husband
Always feel under-appreciated by your significant other? Feel overwhelmed by housework? Significant other cranky in the afternoon/evenings? Here's your way to a happier house!
For the ladies who stay at home or do the majority of the housework. Here's a few tips!
Let's face it. Men's brains work completely differently than women's. So when it comes to cleaning we can spend the whole day doing the whole house and them think we've done nothing, or the total opposite. Us doing nothing and them thinking we've cleaned. The reason is to their simple minds they register a few things right off the bat to them that stick out, and depending on the condition of those things, their minds determine within SECONDS of walking through the door if the house is clean or not. Think I'm crazy? Just try it!
I know there are days when you just can't do everything, so what if you could give the illusion of clean to your man, and still get everything else done you need to for the day!?
The hardest part is being a detective. If you don't think you can casually ask him what matters to him (and actually get an honest answer, not what he THINKS you want to hear because he thinks its a trap haha) then you have to be a little more sly. Where does he go when he comes home? What's the first thing he does? Looks at? When he does clean, what does he do first? Those subtle things are clues into his mind.
*most* men don't notice when you've scrubbed the floor, but they WILL notice the smell. They won't notice you organized all the shelves, but they WILL notice toys all over the floor. They won't notice how much laundry is actually DONE, just what's laying out (clean or dirty). They won't notice you scrubbed the counters, and baseboards and range of the kitchen. But they WILL notice the stove top and dishes in the sink!
To us, we like details. To men they see the big picture.
Regardless of what you have time to do, always make sure your man's routine is done, and spend whatever else time you have working on the things that matter to you... organizing that closet, wiping baseboards, ect. I assure you if you do what they SEE first, then they will be in a better mood for the whole evening. :)
If you're still stumped on how his mind works, here is a default men cleaning routine that is likely to have your man kicking off his boots and kissing your cheek with a smile.
'The Eye Trick'
only have a few mins and not sure what to do first? Walk into a room with your eyes closed and notebook & pen. Be careful! And stand in the center. Open your eyes. Write down the first 5 things that stick out to you like a sore thumb. Clean those in order!
Wipe down counters, put away clutter, food, ect. (find a spot he won't care if cabinets are disheveled just what's visible) Wipe the stove. Do dishes and PUT AWAY. (if you don't have time to do dishes, & you don't have a dishwasher like myself) rinse and place them in strainer under the sink, rinse out your sink and leave it wet. For some reason men associate wet sink with clean dishes and house work. If there are BIG spots on the floor, spot mop, otherwise you can skip that day, or do if you have time left over.
If your trash is over flowing, even if it's his job. Do it. It makes a difference, and casually mention you did the trash. You win brownie points and he feels crappy for forgetting. Win-win!
Chill him a drink in the fridge. He won't forget this.
pick up toys, laundry, anything laying out. Do your eye trick! If a lot of crumbs are out, vacuum. If not, skip. Throw away any trash. Always leave your vacuum where he can see it, even if you didn't use it! You can put it away after he comes home, but just let him take mental note of seeing it and he will automatically assume you vacuumed.
Bedroom: MAKE BED. You should ALWAYS make your bed when you wake up. It starts you off on the right foot for the whole day! Pick up any clothes, throw away any trash. Do your eye trick. If you can't put away laundry, hide it in a basket in the closet until you can get to it. Out of sight, out of mind!
Laundry room: If you don't have time to DO laundry, then make sure it's not visible. Throw just one load in the washer. Wipe up any spills and pick up anything sticking out like sore thumb.
Don't worry about scrubbing your tub, instead pay attention to excess soap spills, hair, toys. Just make it look neat and that's all he will see. Pick up any clothes. If you can't take out trash, push it down in the basket so it doesn't look full, otherwise take out trash. Make sure counter and sink is clean. Men, for some reason, notice sinks? Just something I've taken note of over the years. They hate toothpaste, hair, ect in the sink. They also hate hair products, flat irons and general crap laying on the bathroom counters. Spot wipe the mirror quickly with vinegar. If they can see themselves better than that morning, suddenly the whole bathroom feels cleaner to them. Also something I've noticed over the years.
Clean off table. I don't care where you put it, just put it somewhere other than your table. Your table should ALWAYS be empty. Wipe table. Do your eye trick for anything remaining.
Before he gets home:
Make sure you're dressed and hair is at least brushed, even if you haven't had time to shower. Men have to dress to go to work, they hate coming home to a woman in PJs or sweats. Spray on a little perfume. He WILL notice.
Make sure kid(s) (if you have them) faces/hands are clean. Diaper(s) clean and changed.
Make sure the washer and if at all possible the dryer are going. Busy machines he will notice before the actual sight of everything. (remember that one load of laundry I told you to put in earlier? Makes sense now, huh?)
Make sure all toys are picked up and out of sight.
Men's noses notice WAY more then their eyes do. This is why i love my crunchy owl mama cleaners. As I clean they leave behind a pleasant smell that lingers for hours. So when he walks through the door he's greeted with the aroma of deliciousness without having to worry about a scentsy or candle going. It's just 'in the air' and automatically makes your house smell clean, setting the stage for the entire home! Pick his favorite scents when buying your cleaner. If it's a smell that appeases him, he will be in a pleasant mood from the moment he walks through the door!
If you know WHEN to expect him then be busy when he walks through the door. A great way is to be folding laundry on the couch, or scrubbing the tub. These are things he will only notice if he SEES you doing them. If you are busy when he gets home, he automatically makes up his mind that you've been busy all day and won't notice as much the things you didn't get to. If you are sitting when he walks through the door, (even if it's the first time you've sat all day) he automatically determines you've been sitting all day and he will be more likely to notice the little things.
I'm usually wearing an apron over my clothing? Why you ask as you smirk? Because at home we have no uniform. To men they associate working with a certain attire, whether it be military cammies, khakis and polo, or suit & tie. They all have things they wear to work and they usually are different from what they wear off work. There's a reason for that. Men associate work with uniforms. I wear my apron as my "uniform" and when he sees me wearing it, he automatically determines I'm working, or have been. Ah, see? Little things.. little things...
Try to have dinner started if not close to done when he arrives. If it will be a few more hours, then make him a snack.
Depending on his routine when he gets home, if he goes to shower, or takes off his shoes and sits down. If he showers, grab a towel for him, and try not to overwhelm him with ANYTHING from your day until at LEAST 20 mins after he arrives. Allow him to transition. This includes baby duties. If he sits down, then grab that drink you had chilling for him and snack if you made one.
I can promise you if you can do these simple little things your husband will finally appreciate, or appreciate even more, all your hard work and you won't be killing yourself to do it! Everyone's happy!
Finally KEEP THIS A SECRET and whatever you do, don't show him this blog or this whole thing will be down the drain and they will begin to notice EVERYTHING. So do yourself a favor and keep this between us ladies, ;)